I am an open book to some people, but mostly not by choice, mainly to my husband, Guru, Some other teachers, my sister, my mum , aunt and some others. In the recent weeks I’ve found I am actually quite held back in general. I know I strike you as being a very flamboyant and extraverted type but really I’m not. I might be just an extreme extravert amongst the introverts but truly I’m an introvert. I keep things long and deep and inside and keep and keep. The burdens are truly all mine and the weight that comes with it as well I guess….hahaha she laughs with a somewhat sad grin
I’m not for weight loss blogs and glorifying any kind of body type or weight but for me personally something needs to chance. I need to change, my body needs to change and before you all start to read the “love the body you’re in” bible, let me explain:
I have always been quite sturdy but with nicer curves since I was a child. When growing up I was somewhat overweight until I landed at Dharamsala where my body and mind started to transform drastically. As my mind matured (in a buddhist sense), my body became thinner and more bendable like my mind. I was enjoying the exercise I got from walking amongst the mountains and also the exercise I got gallivanting with the lads.- Now the grin is just devious not a hint of sadness!!
Many a tibetan buddhist lama told me since I was a young girl that staying slimmer and taught would be better for me physically and also for my mind and for my spiritual practice. In the convention of our western history this won’t be looked upon fondly but let me tell you actually the meaning of this is very different and goes way beyond the normal conventions of beauty, lust, desire and the notion of success. So it’s not that. for example My mum has also been quite heavy all her life too and no teacher ever told her to get slimmer or loose weight, so why they tell me and always have been telling me?
Well I can’t really know but after this years trip to Nepal I know I want to make a serious effort and follow my guru’s advice and loose weight. Not because my husband want’s me too, not because I’ll be happier or society demands it (they haven’t ever really) but because my body & mind would be rejoicing If I follow my gurus advice or at least my joints and bones will be thankful.
I have always struggled with this advice given to me since many, many years really. Whereas all other advice I can mostly just follow more or less and offer it like guru devotion and let my ego bend, but this one has always been a bright big “NO” balloon like neon structure hanging in the sky.
I really feel that I should stop all pondering why he advises it, I want to treat it like some other advice that I don’t question so much and the results are always phenomenal for my life so why not be bold and follow this advice without any more afterthoughts and only transform this one wish of his as a chance of mine to gain merits by just adhering to it as guru devotion only???
People from the No more Dieting & the opposing weight loss industry and HEAS must be turning in their graves right now (sorry for presuming their are in their graves) and I’m sorry but we can’t debate this one out. I feel that despite what you think or what I can think and debate with myself, I know from experience that more good will come from following my guru than by not following him.
What might come of it???: Full subjugation of this wild mind maybe, with more bliss and emptiness experiences to fill my being with and be of greater benefit for the welfare of all sentient being??!!. This is pure speculation of course but a nice one nonetheless. Anyway you must truly think I must have gone mad by now judging by what you are reading here. But I can see it clearly, I need to do this if only to practice guru devotion.
I just ask you… when you meet me, be kind and let’s meet on the plain of wonderment instead of judgment. I understand all your cons and pros and actually agree with it but in the past all these ideas from outside on weight loss, loving your body now etc have been hampering me following the advice of my guru and I always thought that the wish has to come intrinsically from within me.. But it didn’t. I think in light of doing this for the welfare of others and work on guru devotion I find it maybe more easy to do it this way now. This is more clear in my minds eye.
Want to track my blogs on weight loss out of guru devotion don’t hesitate to contact me or follow my blog or Facebook page which links you can all find on the blog itself
Love you all – Radia, The Unusual Yogini
PS: This blog post is the beginning, but is also my reminder, my help to persevere, my encouragement, my road to change, my map to bliss and me calling my own bluff
PSS: This blog post is not a opinion of others, of weight and certainly not weight in relation to beauty, success, social acceptance etc. This blog is not meant to discriminate against any weight or body type, so don’t try to make it that please!